Six weeks down, a lifetime to go...
Its hard for me to believe that just six weeks ago I left home. It feels like I have been gone much longer than that, in a good way. Yes, I do miss home. But mostly I miss the people, not the place. Living in Costa Rica has been the greatest adventure for me. Everyday I learn a little more about myself. Being here has helped me to see just how much I'm capable of. I think that America can sometimes disable us. We're constantly being fed ideas about who would should be, that we forgot who we are and how much potential we have. Now, don't get me wrong, I love my country (Home of the brave, land of the free, etc. etc. all that jazz). Costa Rica has just been a breath of fresh air for me.
The hardest thing about living in this country is not speaking the language. And while I'm more aware of what I am capable of, not speaking Spanish makes me feel incredibly incapable of doing anything for myself and everything (and I mean EVERYTHING) becomes a challenge. Ordering at a restaurant, hard. Taking a taxi, hard. Communicating with anyone really, hard. It makes my adventurous independent soul want to crawl into bed and hide from all the awkwardness and tension that comes as a side order with a language barrier entree. However, wallowing in my fears is just not an option.
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and Courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."- Joshua 1:9
Forgive me for sounding dramatic before. Life CAN be really difficult here, but only if I ALLOW it to be. Thankfully though, Jesus gave me a pretty great sense of humor. And I've been able to (more like have had to) laugh at myself A LOT. This has truly been one of the most helpful things. Without it, I'm pretty sure I would just stay in bed all day and watch Netflix. But fortunately that's not the case. I go out into the loud, scary spanish speaking streets and seek JOY... and laugh at myself a whole lot.
For the last six weeks, I have been taking language classes. Friday was my last day of classes. No, I'm not fluent but I'm working on it. I can't tell you how many days I left class horribly frustrated. Often times it felt like my teacher was teaching me Japanese and not Spanish. But let me just tell you about my teacher. He is honestly one of the most interesting people I've ever met. The man told the most incredible stories. Ashley and I joked that he was less our Spanish teacher and more our Costa Rican life guide. Who knows, maybe he was just a really good story teller. Nonetheless, we thoroughly enjoyed learning from him.
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| Abraham the Great |
Many days, he would be teaching us something, and I would get frustrated and blurt out something like "Ughhhh I just want to speak spanish already!" (This usually happened when we were learning about the difference between Ser and Estar). Abraham would always reply, "Tranquila Becca, Poco a Poco." Meaning, Calm down, little by little.
LITTLE BY LITTLE. This phrase has not left my mind since the day he first said it to me. We are a generation consumed by instant gratification. But there is so much beauty in the process, and we're all missing it. Sure, it would be great to take a pill and suddenly be fluent in Spanish. But this is not the reality of life. We can't have what we want when we want it all the time. Change takes time. Little by Little we Learn, we grow, we change.
So, Little by Little I am learning what following Jesus means. Little by Little, I am learning how to love better and laugh harder. And Little by Little, I am learning how to speak Spanish!
xoxo
Becca
